Breakup Swag

Sometimes something will hit you and stay with you for a long time. It could be a band, a book, or a person, and it travels with you wherever you go– maybe for years, maybe even forever. It sits there in your pocket, idle but oppressive. At times it might bop around annoyingly in your head or hang from your shoulders like a heavy backpack.

Other times it just sits on your chest and hurts your heart.

“Don’t Haunt This Place” is a breakup song.  It’s not exactly the cliché breakup song, (because really, who needs any more of those), nor is it Adele’s lovely, melodramatic and overplayed “Someone Like You” (come on, that’s everyone’s breakup song). Rural Alberta Advantage’s track is  original and real, emotional yet understated. Between the catchy lyrics–accompanied by Nils Edenloff’s bouncing vocals and spastic drumbeat– you’d think it was almost peppy or something (minus the melancholy violins…).

When I talk about music speaking to you, this is what I mean. This song get lots of action on my iTunes account (give or take 140 plays) and serves as my go-to for when I need to throw on a pair of yoga pants and eat a container of Ben & Jerry’s. It’s the song I played after every breakup. It’s the song I play even when I’m not going through a breakup. My relationship with this song is messy. The track  brings up so many emotions–some good, some bad, and some in between.

Some things stay with you and you can’t let them go. Just ask Joel Barish.

Joel and Clementine pre-breakup

Please, tell me you’ve watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind because otherwise, this post isn’t going to make much sense. Just imagine having the ability to erase painful memories–the death of a loved one, your favorite pet running from home, a heart-wrenching breakup–because the last option is what the two protagonists in the film decide to do. They try and erase each other. The memories won’t exist anymore. No more pain.

But that pain is there for a reason, right? It means that the person you lost meant something to you. That’s stupid, though. That’s just too hard–holding that pain inside, addressing it, feeling yourself falling apart…

It’d be just easier to erase it.

“I need you now,
I need you then,
I never want to feel this again.”

But if you erase that, you erase everything–the happiness, the depression, the anger, the proof that you’re not just an empty, hollow shell. You felt something. You loved. It was beautiful.

Then something happened, you took a wrong turn and something broke.

It’ll be okay, though. It always ends up being okay in the end. And even if it isn’t, you learn how to handle it and move forward.

“I know it’s right, I know it’s okay,
And I’d like to see you now and again,
This was hard it was dumb we should do it again,
Give ourselves some time ten years from the day.”

So throw on your comfiest sweater–the one that makes you feel like you’re getting a hug from an old friend–and your favorite shoes. Make sure you feel confident, cute, and put together (even if you’re the total opposite). Or go a little crazy. You deserve to, after all.

Clementine-inspired feel good outfit.

Even if you don’t feel good, you can still try to look good. Because really, it’ll all blow over.

So in the meantime, have some fun with your funkiest coat…

…and it never hurts to change up your hair a little either.


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